Day 21

Now I can see him, in the corner of my eyes. He’s so big that it’s like seeing a forest in your peripheral vision.

He’s tall, too, and he’s like liquid. A little of him is everywhere, and it’s all pooling around me. I’m drowning in him.

I shouldn’t have gone to the forest. Or I shouldn’t have left. Or I shouldn’t have started this whole blog in the first place.

My roommate’s name was Ben. I can see his face in my mind’s eye. I can see all of them, impaled on the branches.

I can’t keep doing this.

Goodbye.

Day 20

They’re all still missing.

I destroyed my Wonderland today, too, but I can still feel the dread when I’m sleeping.

I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.

Day 19

If I don’t force for a while, my tulpa will simply cease to exist. It’s still vulnerable enough that it shouldn’t be able to feel that.

With how strong my recent forcing has been, though, that could take a couple of days. But once I don’t have a tulpa any more, it shouldn’t come for me.